BlogValentinesday

"I dreamed of an elegant
wedding, with a lovely little
church
Filled with family and friends.
I asked him what kind of
wedding he dreamed of, and
he said, 'One that will make
you my wife'" - Alfred, Lord
Tennyson

Hate leaves ugly scars, love
leaves beautiful ones.
- Mignon McLaughlin

Conversation between the
rabbit and the skin rocking
horse in the nursery: "Real
isn't how you are made," said
the Skin Horse. "It's a thing
that happens to you. When a
child loves you for a long,
long time, not just to play
with, but REALLY loves you,
then you become real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the
Rabbit. "Sometimes," said
the Skin Horse, for he was
always truthful. "When you
are Real you don't mind
being hurt." "Does it happen
all at once, like being wound
up," He asked, "or bit by bit?"
It doesn't happen all at once
said the Skin Horse, "You
become. It takes a long time.
That's why it doesn't happen
to people who break easily,
or have sharp edges, or who
have been carefully kept.
Generally, by the time you are
Real, most of your hair has
been loved off, and your eyes
drop out and you get loose in
the joints and very shabby.
But these things don't matter
at all, because once you are
Real you can't be ugly, except
to people who don't
understand" - The Velveteen
Rabbit by Marjorie Williams

"One word frees us from all
the weight and pain in life.
That word is love."
- Sophocles
True love does not come by
finding the perfect person, but
by learning to see an
imperfect person perfectly."
- Jason Jordan

Love is patient, Love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not
boast, it is not proud.
Love is not rude, it is not
self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it
keeps no records of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always
trusts,always hopes, always
preserves. Love never fails.
The Bible - Corinthians
13: 4-8

And for the cynics:

Love is the word used to
label the sexual excitement of
the young, the habituation of
the middle-aged,and the
mutual dependency of the
old. - John Ciardi

The genesis of the St. Valentine's celebration depends largely on whom it is that you ask. There are at least two
martyrs named Valentine, and later a third St. Valentine from Africa, who was martyred on February 14, but did not
receive a saint's day. Another interpretation has Valentine's Day rooted in pagan traditions performed during the
Roman festival of Lupercalia. In this celebration, area bachelors drew maidens' names in honor of fertility and the
sex goddess Fabruta Juno; the newly formed couple spent the ensuing year as lovers. Keep in mind this was
beforeMatch.com. However, the celebration we know today as Valentine's Day is by and large affixed to the legend
of Saint Valentin of Rome. It is also a story that many in the LBGBT community find filled with hope, particularly in
these days of religious zealotry and state-sanctioned homophobia.

In third century Rome, the Emperor Claudius II, decreed
a moratorium on marriage, believing that married and
engaged men made for inferior soldiers. For his war with
the Goths, Claudius II wanted his soldiers testosterone-
filled and frustrated (I can identify with that). His planned
worked; his conquest of the Goths was one of the most
successful in the history of Roman arms. It was, however,
the young lovers who paid the price for his victory. While
some marriages were sanctioned despite the ruling,
these exceptions were made mostly for those of the
wealthy or the otherwise affluent. Those in the lower
social strata, or somehow deemed undesirables, were
persistently denied the sanction of marriage.

Serving as a priest under Pope Gelasius,
Saint Valentine recognized the hopelessness growing
among Roman would-be lovers, and was aghast that the
emperor should deny a people the right to proclaim their
love before God. He began performing clandestine
marriage ceremonies; wine cellars or sheds became
secret sanctuaries in which, by the light of only a candle
or the moon, Saint Valentine joined these lovers in
matrimony.

Pope Gelasius strongly disapproved of Valentine’s
actions; in these days when nobility was perceived as
God-like, disloyalty to one’s government was tantamount
to disloyalty to heaven itself. Despite papal protests,
Valentine continued his clandestine ceremonies’;
eventually Claudius II had him imprisoned. Certain that
he was doing God’s work by joining lovers in marriages
that the state denied them, Valentine resisted Claudius II’
s insistence that he convert his believes to that of
Roman Paganism, and that theses ceremonies be
ceased.

Eventually Claudius II had Valentine put to death by
beheading on February 14, 270 C.E. Legend tells a
story of Valentine falling deeply in love with his jailor’s
daughter, whom he purportedly cured of blindness.
Before his death, he closed his last missive to her by
signing, ”Love, Your Valentine”. A phrase still used
today. St. Valentines Day was on the official Church list
of feast days until 1969, when Pope Paul VI had it
removed from the official calendar. I guess the
generation of love’s influence didn’t make it all the way
up to the Vatican.

Those of us in the LGBT community know that there is a
special place in heaven for Saint Valentine, and those
like him, who went against convention even when that
convention was their own religious doctrine, to recognize
that love knows no convention. We must honor also the
many brave men and women working within today’s
religious communities to bring equality to the LGBT
community. They deserve our support in their quest to
fight today’s Claudius’ – or Bushes.